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My Nugget

I started writing this a few days after I found out I was pregnant. Now I’m writing this after spending hours in the ER to find out you’re gone. I spent my whole life saying I never wanted kids, then the moment I found out I was I was so excited. By the end of the night I knew you’d be either a miss Lennon Amira (or Lennon Sarai) or William Dearron. Now my heart feels crushed. Who knew a person I had never met before could make me feel so many emotions at once. I know this is the story of many women and I’m not alone, but at the same time I’d imagine things would be different for me. I looked forward to my belly. I looked forward to holding you for the first time, watching you bond with your dad and sister. I looked forward to first steps, first words, and first days of school. I don’t know how many losses in my life I can take. I know it was only two months, but I feel like I lost a child. I’m just devastated. I feel like it’s my fault. I know it’s not, but that …

Blowing Smoke

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"Below A View" 2018© Photo: Asia Aneka Anderson IG: Asia_Aneka_Writes

Tragic Best Friend Tales #4

In light of a few things going on in my life dealing with relationships I figured I do one of these since its been a while.
        I want to talk about friend G. Unlike my other tales this is about me. No need to freak out and think “Oh God what kind of story is she conjuring up for me.” Just relax. G was, has, and is an amazing friend. We have the type of friendship where we don’t need to talk all of the time, but we’re always there for each other. Correction: She’s mostly there for me. Myself for her could use some work.
        We’ve known each other at least 20+ years and in all of those years I don’t think I’ve been a good enough friend to her. None of that was intentional, of course, but somehow that would always be the outcome. One of the first instances that I knew I hurt her was the year I graduated high school. I was a year before her and I remember her wanting to come to the graduation, but all my tickets went to family members. Actually I was pissed …

The Ramblings Inside My Creative Mind: The Fuckboys Are At it Again

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I came across a post on Facebook that I found a bit troubling. It wasn’t that this post, in particular, was triggering, but that many exist like it and it’s purpose is to solely do one thing: shame women.
        There’s plenty of memes floating on Instagram that people get a kick out of that will shame women for wearing too much makeup, having fake hair, being promiscuous, using Snapchat, what her vagina should smell like, what superficial things she should bring to a relationship, the size of her ass, etc, etc, etc. I could keep going for days. I’m not quite sure what I find saddest; the women who piggyback off of this type of thinking or the men who actually believe this no matter how vastly incorrect some of it may be (for instance the men who believe that if a woman sleeps with multiple men it changes the size of her vaginal wall or that vaginal discharge isn’t normal.)        In this day and age, why do people 40 and under keep pushing this negative image of …