Showing posts from November, 2014

Hair Growth Update

Hi everyone,
I just wanted to show you guys an update on my hair growth. I made a few posts in the past about the castor oil challenge. This challenge started in September and ends this week.
As you can see my hair has grown a bit. Not a whole lot, but I can definitely see a difference. For some reason it's growing faster in the back than anywhere else. The kind of castor oil I've using is the Jamaican black. I use it everyday around my edges, hairline, and the nape of my neck (pretty much the whole circumference of me head) and on the crow of my head. This is the result of that. There is another castor oil challenge coming up and you have until December 7th to register and will run until March 1st. You should really join and if not you should at least pop by the website because this girl posts amazing tips for natural hair. I'll try to post more updates as far as my natural hair journey. I still have a few reviews to do that hopefully I can get up in the next few weeks. I…

My Country Tis of Thee

I live in a country where my future children will have targets on their backs.
Where from a young age I’ll have to train them to have two different personae and in order to become successful they may have to make the hard choice to abandon who they truly are to adopt the persona that makes people more “comfortable”.                                                         
A country where I’ll have to tell them that if they’re around police or in a white neighborhood to not look “suspicious”. I’ll have to remind them to always keep their heads up, be super friendly, and smile, no matter what kind of day you’re having, as to not look threatening.
Where I’ll have to make sure they know the laws and their rights as if they’d written them themselves.
Where if their clothes are a size or two too big they’ll be perceived as “thugs” and “criminals” even if they are straight A or honor roll students.
A country where I will have to thoroughly teach my future children the horror …

What I'm Thankful For

Some years it’s easy to think of what I’m thankful for while some years I wonder “what’s the point?”
I’m thankful that I’m here to see another day even though there are days I wish I didn’t exist.
I’m thankful that I get better each day.
I’m thankful for the strength that keeps me going when I want to give up.
I’m thankful for the small number of people that genuinely care. The ones that I know I can truly count on.
I’m thankful for Tumblr for giving me a place to not be afraid to share my life with total strangers.
I’m thankful for these total strangers who saw my cries for help when those around me didn’t. Thank you for lending me your ears.
Even though I want more and have had more in the past I’m thankful for what I have right now.
I’m thankful for the once in a lifetime experiences I’ve had.
I’m thankful for the laughter through the tough times.
I’m thankful for the ability to feel. For so long I thought that I was dying inside.
I’m thankful for the talent I have wit…

The Mighty Flower Grows

I hear the beating of the rain against my window.
The skies overcome with grey.                                          
A lightening fear shakes the ground.                                                 
When the tears fall from the sky life can begin down below.
What I wouldn’t give to be a flower standing in the rain.
Mighty, powerful, and strong.                                                        
Breaking the surface to be free.
Facing the howling wind my roots keeping me grounded and brave.
From this darkness can I grow?
Grow to be mighty?
Grow to tower over my fears?
Or will the darkness of the clouds make me weary?                          
Sunlight fades away the grey.                                                            
Again I am mighty, powerful, and strong.      

 -Asia Aneka Anderson                  
Tumblr: AsiaWrites

Tragic Crush Tales #4

If you’ve read any of the lovey dovey type poems I’ve posted as of late they are all about crush L. The only words I can use to describe this man is: intelligent, caring, cool, laid back, artistic, and the perfect match for me, truly.
I met him at my first job in Chicago back in 2009. When I first laid eyes on him I just knew he was someone I was going to click with. The romantic feelings didn’t start off right away. I still had an overwhelming feeling of nervousness because I’m in this big city by myself and hadn’t been there long, I was starting this job where most people had been for a long time, were a tight knit family, and I know I’m not the easiest person to get to know, and when I did start this job I was given a heads up that the store was closing in less than a year. With all of those feelings swirling in my head I had no time to stop and listen to my heart pitter-patter.
I quickly started to fit in and especially when months later a girl from another store cam…

Tragic Crush Tales #3

Crush G was the shit sprinkles on top of a shit sundae that 2013 was starting out to be. I had met G on Twitter of all places. We noticed each other through a mutual person we were following. The weird thing about it is the person we were following was the girl who was the main person in the Catfish finale of season 1. That should have been a sign. Well, one day she was tweeting about not being able to find love (this was all before her episode even aired) and we both at the same time were trying to give her encouraging words. We both saw each other and liked what we saw and it all started from there. We’d message each other all the time and send little flirtatious tweets back and forth.
        As sad as it sounds during this time he became my everything. Just a few months earlier I was kicked out of my place in Chicago and had to move back to Dayton. People that I called my very best friends were super excited I was coming back home, but when I did land in Ohi…

Tragic Boyfriend Tales #4

I met boyfriend L through a mutual friend. I thought he was very attractive and asked my best friend to set us up. To this day I still believe our first date was the best first date I’d ever been on. We went to dinner and a movie and since we didn’t want to leave each other we went back to his place and stayed up all night watching movies. I was leaving Ohio for Chicago not even two months after we met, but we decided to give a relationship a go anyways. We became attached to the hip instantly, making sure to spend every minute together until it was time for me to leave. I fell for him hard from the start. Very hard.

One day he was over at my house. We got tired of packing and decided to take a movie break. The movie started to bore me halfway through so I started playing a game on his phone. All of a sudden he takes the phone from me and tells me he wants to show me something. He flips through his phone for a few minutes and then shoves it in my face once he’s found th…

Another Naturally Me

I haven't posted much about it since I started the castor oil challenge. It's a 3 month challenge to help promote natural hair growth. Well the challenge is almost over and I couldn't be happier with my hair. I can definitely tell that it's growing and it's incredibly soft. A new challenge is starting up December 7th and you should definitely join. Within the next couple of weeks I'll post updates of my hair growth progress as well as reviews for the castor oil I have been using as well as a new coconut oil I purchased recently. I wanted to share a few pics with you guys of my hair pinned up. My twist outs never go as planned so I've been playing around with different styles. I don't feel like my hair is long enough or the texture to do a lot of styles I'd like to, but I'm learning.
I was messing around with my hair the other day and was able to get my hair to do hat I wanted for once. So I'll try my best to get these updates posted soon and…

Killing Myself To Be Pretty

I’ve never been the pretty girl and the world would always remind me.
As a young girl I learned that no one liked ugly.
I’d stare into mirrors and ponder why God would do such a thing.
Picked on by the boys in class.
Treated like the outcast at home.
Ugly duckling.
Black sheep.
I grew into a woman constantly wanting to feel pretty.
Self conscience of everything about me.
Pulling, tugging, and sucking it in.
When my hips expanded the world was sure to point it out.
When I didn’t wear makeup the world turned up its nose in disgust.
Skip a meal or two or three.
Create homemade mask that could burn away the ugly.
When my waist started to shrink and my skin began to clear the world struggled to find the words of praise as if the words would burn their lips.
Backhanded compliments of “You’d look better if….” and “You look nice, but…” were the norm.
Genuine words of encouragement were far and few in between.
Still I felt unpretty.
Still I stood in the mirror asking “Why?”
Why can’t I be b…

Who I Am.

I know exactly who I am. I have no idea where I’m going, I don’t know what life has in store for me, and I don’t know what I want to be, but I DO know who I am. I don’t think a lot of people truly know deep down who they are. When I say that I mean I know how I act, react, my flaws, I know my strengths and my weaknesses, and I embrace all of this. I feel like that’s rare. I feel that way because I don’t know many people who embrace their weaknesses and flaws. Honestly I probably embrace those parts of myself more than my strengths. I think weakness and flaws mold you more than anything because you learn from them.

I know that I have a horrible habit of treating my shitty friends like gold and my golden friends like shit. I’ve always been like that and I don’t know why. I see it. I recognize it. I try to catch myself when I see myself doing it, but sometimes it’s too late. I’ve been accused of being an overprotective friend. It’s true to a point, but it’s because I don’t…

Tragic Crush Tales #2

When I was a freshman in high school there was this guy who was absolutely gorgeous. G was this sexy chocolate dude, who seemed sweet, his family was religious, and he had an amazing voice. We were in choir together. We didn’t talk TOO much, but he was always nice when we did. He was very easy going and I have always been very shy. Somehow my best friend got his number and we would call him often, giggling like 14 year old girls usually do when you talk to the cute boy in class. One day after school I decided to stay behind with my best friend and roam around our new school. We watched the boys practice basketball, bugged a few of our favorite teachers, and we came across G roaming the halls. As soon as we saw him my friend pushed me towards him and bolted to “give us time alone to flirt” cause she knew I wouldn’t do without a metaphorical, or in this case, physical push. We only chatted for a few minutes and before I knew it he pulled me off into this little nook and p…

Tragic Crush Tales #1

Crush D was kind of a complicated situation. He was my manager. It wasn’t as awkward as you would think. We were the same age, he was covered in tattoos, a sneaker head, etc. So he wasn’t this stuck up bent out of shape slave driver that comes to mind when you think “boss”. He was hella cool and flirtatious and he helped me out a lot when it came to giving me more hours. So I was more drawn to his personality, as well as most other girls that worked with us. Everyone was in love with this dude.
        Around Christmastime one year most of us decided to head to a popular club to celebrate the holidays and he kept asking me that whole week if I was going. For me it wasn’t really worth it because I lived pretty far and the bus that would take me home stopped running at 12:30am and I didn’t want to be that party pooper who had to leave after about an hour. That didn’t keep him from asking me so I started to reply with “I’ll go if you drop me off at home so I don’t …

Love Is Simple

From first glance I knew it was love.
Nothing existed in this world but us.
My past heartbreaks you erased.
To love you is simple.
Nothing can break the bond we share.
This love is eternal.
A “til death do us part” kind of love.
I can’t think of anything simpler than loving you.
My days are better with your love.
I had lost hope until I felt the kind of love only you can give.
A love that can never be replaced.
Finding that type of love is rare.
I can get used to the smile you put on my face.
My heart is aflutter from this simple love.
Floating on a cloud of utter happiness.
What we have is as real as it gets.
I love you.
It’s that simple.

-Asia Aneka Anderson
Tumblr: AsiaWrites

Tragic Boyfriend Tales #3

Boyfriend J was a train wreck that I kept reliving. We were absolute best friends in high school. To say that I was in love with this dude from day one would be an understatement, but we never dated while in school. We did date after we graduated but he soon dived into drugs and I was busy living college life so we eventually drifted apart. We would sometimes go years without talking then suddenly he’d call or message me out of the blue and it would be like we were 15 again and I’d fall hard all over again. I was truly convinced he was my soulmate and that one day he’s see it too. We again lost contact when I moved out of state. On his birthday, August of 2011, I wished him a happy birthday on FB like most people do. Out of nowhere he called me that night and we talked for hours. I turned into a teenager like I  always do and in a instant was ready to turn my life upside down and move back home just for him. That’s how much of a grip he had on me. I settled on just comi…

My Old Friend

When everyone leaves there’s always one friend who will always be there. Too bad it’s the one friend I’d love to shake. Depression has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. As I get older my cloud gets bigger and bigger. It’s almost as if my depression is aging with me, growing bitter and old. My depression gives zero fucks as to when it hits me. It’s only mission is to make me feel worthless, hopeless, trapped, angry, overwhelmed, unloved, and like trash. I’m not sure if it’s because I’ve gotten older that it has gotten worse or because I have no distraction. I have no friends, no job, and no relationship. With the absence of all these things it’s a vicious cycle. I’m already depressed, I have none of the wants and needs in life which makes me more depressed which leads me to not pursing said wants and needs in life which makes me sink into a deeper depression. Once I can get the slight motivation to go after something some fear creeps into my mind and …

Where You Begin And I End

I want to know all about you
Let’s have deep conversation at midnight under the stars
What makes you tick?
What makes you happy?
What turns you on?
What do you dream?
What are your failures?
I want to know everything
To be close to you
To be the one who understands you
To know how you think
That’s all I want
I want you to know me
My darkest secrets
My passion
My quirks
Us as best friends and lovers
Completing each others sentences
Knowing what the other is thinking with just one glance
No judgment towards each other
Just love
Just understanding
Just happiness
That’s all I’ve ever wanted.

-Asia Aneka Anderson
Tumblr: AsiaWrites