Fighting To Survive

Surviving is a tricky thing.
The day starts with the decision whether or not to get out of bed.
Some days you can’t move.
You’re paralyzed.
You try to force yourself to live.
You put on your war paint.
It’s a smile on top of a broken spirit.
Surviving just to be alive.
Is it worth it?
Some days the war paint smears from the tears that fall.
There is no surviving to live life.
Just merely existing.
Day after day of just being.
The adventures are nil.
The smiles are forgotten.
You fight to survive, but with no reason.
As the day goes on your mask starts to chip away.
Your hidden frown is unveiled.
Some ask if you’re okay just to be polite.
Most stare as if sadness is contagious.
You slink away to not cause a mass outbreak of your poisonous thoughts.
You survive being alive alone.
You reach out to save yourself.
Do you even want to be saved?
You can see life waiting for you live it.
All you can manage is being barely alive.
You fight for life to no avail.
So you wait it out while only existing.
Surviving is a tricky thing when you just want to live.
One day you wake up and no longer need a mask.
Seeing clearer and wanting more.
That day you can say you survived the storm.
You made it through to see life as it’s supposed to be.
Until that day you keep fighting.
Don’t fight to exist.
Fight to stay alive.

Asia Aneka Anderson, Fighting To Survive 2015©